You'll probably get fired for it, but hey it was a good run.\n\nYou decide to be honest with him. Your boss sees you and asks you why you did that. You are honest back and you're fired.\n\nThe next few days you ask your friends for a job and they know of a place. It's a game tester job! You can make $2000 a week! You take them up and climb the ladder and now you're Bobby Kotick. Congrats!
So if things kind of sucked before, now they really suck. You're in what <<$workplace>> calls "The dead Zone", which lasts pretty much lasts until just before lunch time. It's about now that "that guy" wanders up. You know the guy. He's the one who has nothing better to do than go to <<$workplace>> at lunch time.\n\nHe comes up to the counter and rests his belly on it. If he was any shorter he'd be resting his boobs on it, so that's a plus. You wouldn't be surprised if he drooled on it.\n\n"Welcome to <<$workplace>>, can I help you?" you say, begrudgingly.\n\n"Hi. I'm just looking. Just looking. Just. Looking." He says, as he stares into space.\n\nYou wonder why he came up to the counter if he's just looking. Then he speaks.\n\n<<if $workplace == 'GameStop'>>\n[["Isn't Ivy hot?"|gamestop_sexy_lady]]\n<<else>>\n[["Do you think if I went on a McDonalds diet I could get it sponsored?"|mcdonalds_sponsored_diet]]\n<<endif>>
You wake up and look at the alarm clock. You think, "I am tired of dealing with assholes."\n\nThat's pretty much it. "I'm tired."\n\n"Of dealing with assholes."\n\nSee, you have this job. Well, it's more of a career than a job. But only because of how long you've been there. You work at\n\n[[GameStop|gamestop]]\n\n[[McDonalds|mcdonalds]]
Decisions like this are why you have this life. You're more concerned with keeping a job you don't even want instead of being honest with yourself, your customers, and your company. You may want to rethink your life and get into a position where you don't have to lie.\n\nThe asshole here is you.\n\nIt's you.
"You know, from Soul Blade. Or Soul Calibur, if you're not old skoooool!" he says.\n\n"Yeah, she's something else," you say.\n\n"Sometimes I put the game on autoplay and just watch. You know?"\n\n"I'm sure it's great," you say. You're beginning to understand the standee out front.\n\n"Do you have any suggestions?"\n\nAnd you're confronted with one of the most difficult questions someone in your position has to face. Do you give the person what you know they'll buy or do you suggest something you know that they won't buy, but would expand their horizons and suggest something that might widen their appreciation knowing that they won't buy anything.\n\n[[Suggest Boobs|job]]\n\n[[Suggest Art|honesty]]
<<silently>>\n<<set $workplace = "GameStop">>\n<<endsilently>>Here's your day at <<$workplace>>. You get there at 9:00 AM and take the money to the bank. You wait in line behind everyone else who works at the mall and eventually put your money bag in the slot.\n\nWhy does the bag smell like urine? Because the bag is older than videogames themselves and used to belong to Orange Julius, and not the one with a Dairy Queen attached. You know what I-er you're saying, right?\n\nSo after dropping the bag off you get back to work and slide open the gate. The gate is really loud, really heavy, and not automatic. It takes a while to get it up then place out the standees. Some of them have swords. Some of them have lasers. All of them have a girl in a bikini on them.\n\nIncidentaly, those standees make more money in a day than all of your new game sales put together. They basically pay for your salary. What is wrong with this industry?!\n\n[[Anyway|anyway]]
Your work day
Wes Ehrlichman
<<silently>>\n<<set $workplace = "McDonalds">>\n<<endsilently>>You get there at 6:00 AM and it's already incredibly busy. Like, incredibly busy. You don't even have time to clock in before some geriatric fuck is begging you for their free senior coffee. You've got nothing against old people.\n\nHonestly.\n\nYou don't.\n\nBut they're <html><i>always</i></html> there, and they never spend over $1.50.\n\nSo you barely have time to get on your 'M' cap before your line is backed up with 10 people without a single original tooth between them.\n\nAnd then, as quickly as they arrive, they're gone. 10:00. Noone.\n\n[[Anyway|anyway]]
"You know, like Jared," he says.\n\n"Umm, maybe?" you don't know how to explain to him that eating even a salad at McDonalds every day would probably kill him.\n\n"I'm going to try it today. Give me a number 1 and a number 6," he says.\n\n"I'm sorry?" you say.\n\n"I'm sorry, the numbers changed, didn't they. I'd like a Big Mac meal and a 10 piece nugget meal. Oh yeah, and make is super sized."\n\n"We don't say that anymore," you're contractually obligated to say.\n\n"Well then large, whatever. You know what I mean." He says.\n\nSo you ring it up and take his money.\n\n"Should I come back tomorrow and start my diet?"\n\nAnd there it is. The question you're not equipped to answer. Are you honest and tell them how to live a healthy life or do you do your job a favor and get $20 a day until the guy keels over?\n\n[[Tell them to rethink their plan and actually go on a diet|honesty]]\n\n[[Tell him that you'll see him tomorrow|job]]